chapter 04

And one other event on that weekend. Our youth Pastor had informed us that the other Christians were weird because they believed one could lose their salvation.

Since I was already an atheist, I didn't see how that made them scary. But they ate on one side of the cafeteria, the others, us good Baptists, on the other side.

And one afternoon they did something crazy. A boy was put on a chair away from the tables and I looked up and saw the girls lining up.

"What's going on."

"He has a birthday."

"I have one as well."

Not that day. But I got up and went over beside him. Felt a little funny and knelt beside him, after him in the row, till someone brought me a chair. And I looked and saw the most beautiful angel watching me. She smiled and stood up to joint the line.

And the boy next to me and I got a kiss from the girls.

Thank fuck I had enough sense to know our youth pastor was an idiot.

vs. 12: Do not let anyone look down on you because you are young, but be an example for the believers in your speech, your conduct, your love, faith, and purity. EQ

And if you can get 30 kisses from thirty young women, it don't matter what anyone believes.

chapter 05

Paul is being an ass.

vs. 6: But a widow who gives herself to pleasure has already died, even though she lives. EQ

Paul. Fuck. What is your damage. Where do you get off telling people what to do and how to act. For Christ Sake. You want a theater of quiet submission to the laws you give after telling us to drop the Laws of Moses which said the same shit.

Jesus Christ says get a dildo and keep the sex organs humming. Or another man. Or another woman. And enjoy your body. It is yours.

vs. 17: The elders who do good work as leaders should be considered worthy of receiving double pay, especially those who work hard at preaching and teaching. EQ

You are a self serving asshole. Paul.

Then he quotes the Torah completely out of context.

The elders are full of shit. Ancestor worshippers. I rebuke them. Unless they ain't idiots. Like my grampy wasn't. Who taught and didn't preach.

vs. 20: Rebuke publicly all those who commit sins, so that the rest my be afraid. EQ

Fuck you. Paul. Moses ruled with fear. And we have had far too much.

I rebuke your stupid rules.

chapter 06

Paul tells the slaves to work hard for their Christian masters.

Jesus Christ says. Fuck you, Paul. It is the worship of gold that makes us believe people should be our slaves. Asshole.

vs. 2: ... You must teach and preach these things. 3. Whoever teaches a different doctrine and does not agree with the true words of our Lord Jesus Christ and with the teaching of our religion... EQ

Fuck you, Paul. You are a lieing bastard.

Jesus Christ had only one commandment.

Love Life. Love one another.

So fuck you and your fucked up rules.

vs. 5: ... They think that religion is a way to become rich. EQ

It is. One of the easiest ways. Tell lies, get rich.

"If you don't get our petroleum based real fuckin' expensive cream, you will never ever be sexy."

Fuck you.

vs. 10: For the love of money is a source of all kinds of evil. EQ

No shit. The love of money results directly in the Love of Lies and the hate for life.

Gold fever. It is killing us.

vs. 13: I command you 14. to obey your orders... EQ

Fuck off. I command you not to obey commands. Fuck the military rule.

vs. 16: He alone is immortal... EQ

You are going to wish you weren't, asshole.


second timothy chapters 01 - 03