steve howard's update of the new testament
BARBARALBA BIBLE

THE NEW NEW TESTAMENT

The Gospel According to MARK

 

chapter 13

Take note that Jesus told only his disciples about the temple coming down. Which temples always do. Everything ever built crumbles eventually. It’s basic physics.

By the way, you shouldn’t believe. Look and see. Listen and hear. Like an animal. Because we are animals. With real instinct that evolution has granted us.

Many men will come and say I’m Jesus. Well guess what. They are full of shit.

And don’t be surprised if there is war at home and abroad. There is always war.

GNB vs. 8: “... These things are like the first pains of childbirth.” EQ.

And this is a most important concept that needs be understood. The stuff with earthquakes and natural disaster, well, we live on a shaky planet so until we leave it, there will be catastrophic events. But think about the war business. Not so much the business of it but that we are often doing it. Less often now than ever before, though most would disagree, because they are ignorant, but that we have evolved from mad killer primates and when we get beyond our sheep brain ignorance we will finally be born into consciousness. And all these brutal years of inhumanity will come to an end. The pain will be behind us, as it is with childbirth. And we will be conscious angels. Real aware eternal creatures. Not somewhere else after we die. Here when we awaken. And that is the essence of verse eight.

You’ll be killed, beaten and whatnot for attempting the leap from being slaves of the ruling lying class to the next level of evolution, a free creature of the heavens.

And the remedy is so easy no one wants to hear it.

Love Life and your fellow creatures.

The priests of the War Lords are evil liars.

Preach my gospel to all creatures. Don’t sell them a bloody church. I am preaching against that very tyranny.

For Christ’s sake.

Then Jesus talks about the Catholic inquisition as if he could smells what people would do with his name. Evil bastards. Slugs of hell.

But Jesus says, “After the Catholic Church has raped and murdered and plundered in my name, as my ancestors in God’s name, other’s in other Gods’ names, people will slowly wake up. The grand lie of belief will be revealed in Barbaralba Bible. There will be many who teach that religion is a crock of shit. Thank Christ.”

Okay, for those of you without half a century of Jesus and Moses manipulating your mind. Here is an obvious juxtaposition.

GNB Vs. 20: “... For the sake of his chosen people,”

That’s the myth of Ab, Isaac and Israel. That God chose one people to rule the world. And the Levites to rule the rulers.

That is war declaration. And the Jews must put down their bloody Torah, holy scriptures, write, ‘Ancient Bloody Science Fiction’ on it and stop their tyrannical lie.

Let us get used to saying:

“I am a creature of life on Earth. Not above or below any other.”

That has a nice ring to it and won’t be offensive even to aliens or AI.

Because it is true for all and requires no hate or killing to protect a lie.

Again the abomination for people in Judea. Very likely another tyrant king. And for a bible quite out of context.

What is a Bible.

Now that you ask, I shall reveal it to you. It is a book with text written by men trying to make enough money to feed their families. And they write what they are told to write.

The end times question.

GNB vs. 24: “In the days after that time of trouble the sun will grow dark, the moon will no longer shine, 25. the stars will fall from heaven, and the powers in space will be driven from their courses. EQ.

This is a round about way of saying we have a long time ahead of us. A very long time. And, though I, your narrator, can not yet prove it, this is not our first time in a universe. Nor will it be the last. Eternity is for real.

Time will end in this universe when there is no more space-time. When the universe runs out. 100 billion years or more. We have much more pressing problems now than the end of the universe.

The biggest problem we have now is the thing on our shoulders.

Gideon vs. 37: And what I say unto you I say unto all, Watch. EQ.

Jesus did not mean television. What he means is watch for the time when we take the power back. We being us and the rest of the animals. Now is the time to remove the tyrants and their whores of holy lies. Stop believing and look. Watch. Know. Understand.

No one suspected this.


chapter 14

The sad news that I must convey before I go on and hope not to lose you is:

The Bible is not very good. There are college students writing better works. Robert Silverberg’s ‘Lord Valentine’s Castle’ was a far better Jesus story. Namor of ‘Castle City’ was also a more real representation of the Jesus Christ character.

And, again, even if he was real, the story is a story, full of contradiction and fantasy.

It is not holy.

Don’t make religions.

Do Not Worship.

Love the creature you are. A beast and a god. And have the courage to love. It isn’t more of a trick than hate.

And it will serve us better and most importantly. Much longer. Embrace life and you will love.

Flog. We haven’t even started yet.

The Jews conspired to kill Jesus secretly. Which was pointless if they publicly present Jesus to Pilate and begged to have him sentenced before the crowds that loved him up until the day he stood on the stage of the king. And they played the theater. Kill the King of the Jews.

Then Mary, the woman of Jesus Christ, mother of seven of his children, poured oil, actually Mark says perfume, expensive stuff, over Jesus. His buddies aren’t happy about her action. More than likely, they aren’t happy that he gives the woman so much attention and affection. Jesus tells them to relax. He said that Mary would never be forgotten for what she did but the writers took her name out and most of everything the women in the life of Jesus did for him. And women did more than enough that when he saw the three stars in the sky that were called the ‘Three Kings’ he thought of them as the ‘Three Sisters’.

“You will not be forgotten as long as this fairy tale lives on. And you will be remembered as the women that guided me back down to earth, down off the cross, 2,000 years later. The gods bless you. The angels of the animal kingdom.”

“Jesus, what are you on about.”

“Mary Helene Magdalene shall not be forgotten. In fact. One day her gospel will be found and transcribed.”

“On gold tablets under a rock brought down by Gabriel in a flying saucer.”

“With rings in the corn field.”

“And a missing cow and a pregnant nun.”

Then it goes on to pass that the Jewish rebels celebrate a Jewish murder festival. Not very Christian of them. Taking part in death Cult rituals.

So what do we do about that detail.

Ignore it.

Just give money to the church.

Not likely. They didn’t have a Passover feast last supper. They intended to party again in Galilee. The Passover was written in by Jewish writers to make certain that the murdering of Egyptians would remain a holy event.

“Ain’t the truth of the matter a real fuck show.”

After Jesus tells them his brother Judas, who he loves, has been chosen to tell the priests that it is now time to arrest Jesus after not doing it any other time.

No crowds.

It’s all bullshit.

Anyway. He does his thing, says his bit, prays to his dad, bitches at his friends.

Judas comes and kisses him.

Everything is sort of the same as the first story. It has to be done like that because it is the script each of the writers got and were told to write a story about a Jew that embraces the Roman church.

Mark adds a character of no significance. Or maybe it is the whole thing. Revealed in an instant.

A young man dressed in a linen cloth was following the vigilante Jewish mob. They tried to arrest him. Then he ran away naked.

Just a reminder, there are no Roman soldiers. Important though insignificant. Only the mad mod lead by the Jewish priests. The Romans didn’t take note of Jesus until he was brought to Pilate.

Which makes me think it was a mostly Jewish conspiracy to make Jesus holy.

So no one would ever again attempt to propose that:

Moses was a big fat lie. God is a big fat lie and there are no real Jews and it wouldn’t matter if there were.

“I am that I am a creature of the life on the planet paradise we call earth. There are two commandments: love life. Love one another. When you have this, you will need no laws or religion.

You will be free creatures in paradise.”

“Kill the bastard.”

They ask Jesus if he was the messiah.

“Ya, sure. I’m one of them.”

“Blasphemy.”

“Kill him.”

Mark repeats similar details about slapping Jesus around and mocking him. And that Peter heard a cock crow. Who the hell hasn’t.


chapter 15

Next morning. Now come, if the Jews wanted Jesus dead, they would simply have him disappear. The show was Jewish. We need not argue that if was only a story and none of it happened. That it is just a personified version of astrology perverted into mind dictatorship. That would be true enough but negate the need to tear at the book. We will continue our quest to pull what we can out of it. Our best approach would be to consider religious works not as works of history of events rather history of mind set.

Now there will be those who speculate that the New Testament isn’t Jewish. Or that the Koran isn’t Jewish. Those would be people who haven’t read the books. No one who has studied them would propose that there was much of a difference between any of them.

“Why you telling us this.”

“To prepare the reader for the notion that the whole theater was very Jewish.”

“What do you mean by Jewish.”

“Jewish is a state of mind. The classic mind set that keeps the participants in the succeeding cultures based on this mind set, this paradigm, following rules. Or another way said. To take the symbolic rituals of our ancestors for real while abandoning the attempt to perceive the real without prefabricated laws and meanings.”

“If you say so.”

“I do.”

But one must also add that Jesus Christ was interesting protocol. There was a little hint of his character in Aaron but Aaron was lost in the shadow of the burning rage of Moses. There was a small bit more in the character of Esau. In the Koran it is ever so hopeless. In the New Testament there is the Jesus character. It is brutally beaten into obscurity by the Jewish style of the writers and massacred by most everything Paul wrote.

So anyslut, Pilate gets to see Jesus for the first time in his life. Herod doesn’t make his appearance in the writing of Mark.

“So, you are the King of the Jews.”

“You said it.”

“Are you aware that the Romans will make a church much like the synagogue if we play this theater through.”

“What else can we do.”

“Well, let’s see if we can set you free.”

GNB vs. 10: He knew very well that the chief priests had handed Jesus over to him because they were jealous. EQ.

Well, when Pilate suggested that Jesus had broken no laws and it would make sense to set him free, the priests rallied the crowd to chant.

“Crucity him!”

“They want you dead, my dear Jesus.”

“They are too frightened to embrace freedom.”

“Nail the bastard to the cross.”

Contradiction alarm. The day before, the same crowd laid down their robes so that the ass of Jesus could walk on them.

Like we mentioned, Pilate doesn’t wash his hands of Jesus in Mark. He whips him. Has him whipped.

The story says the Roman soldiers dressed Jesus up like a King and mocked him.

Not likely. Probability of reality in Fantasy realm. Crucifixion happened in large numbers every day.

And the Jewish priests and Sadducees were under Roman law.

But to follow the script. With intention to close the book. They put Jesus on a hill of his own with two thieves.

Because it was written. Whenever.

Moses did the 3 days of darkness trick in Egypt. An event that bends the needle in the ‘not likely measuring machine’ as it attempts to break the limit of Fantasy.

So they go for 3 hours in the newer book. It’s likely not meant to be literally representative.

And still it is also Fantasy. It doesn’t damage the needle as badly but it is Fantasy. We have seen eclipses. They bring partial darkness for a few minutes. Any other events would require a storm of dust or something similar. Also possible but not likely.

More than likely, just a writer’s liberty. Or an astrological reference.

And some rich Jewish friends run to Pilate.

“Tomorrow is a holy day for us.”

“So what.”

“So we want to bury Jesus now.”

“Who.”

“The King of the Jews.”

“Ah, yes. The King of the Jews. The fellow your priests need to have nailed on a cross for insulting your silly religious rituals. Is he dead already.”

“He is. He died at three.”

“I bet he did. Right around the eclipse.”

GNB vs: 44. Pilate was surprised to hear that Jesus was already dead. He called the army officer and asked him if Jesus had been dead a long time. EQ.

“It was a dark moment for those who loved him.”

“Do whatever you want, for Christ’s Sake. We only nailed him up there at your request.”

“Thank you Lord. You will be rewarded richly.”

Pilate took the large reward and waved them out.

They ran and got Jesus down from the cross.

“Is he still breathing. I can’t find his pulse.”

“He’s not dead. Come, we must hurry.”

GNB vs. 47. Mary Magdalene and Mary the mother of Joseph were watching and saw where the body of Jesus was place. EQ.

Just a reminder for those who wondered if Jesus had a woman lover. He did. Her name was Mary Magdalene.

And another point not to go unnoticed is that it was all in the family. The new tomb had been made for Jesus and there was no secret to it’s whereabouts.


mark chapters 16