chapter 22

Do we attempt to take the Bible literally or struggle to interpret it. Or use it as a character study for the grand mad theater in which we find ourselves.

Vs. 2: “Take your son, your favored one, Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering… EQ.

Now how do we deal with this. Burn your son. It seems somewhat insane.

No never, Ab took Isaac, two servants and his ass loaded with wood and went to burn his son. The son that likely wasn’t his son, to burn. Maybe Ab didn’t love Isaac so very much.

So Ab built an alter and laid out the wood.

Vs. 10: And Abraham picked up the knife to slay his son. EQ.

Because God, the grand killing freak, said so.

Maybe we should wonder if this really is the one true God. Maybe it is a mental indisposition. A megalomaniac sickness in the frightened killer ape bumbling about with consciousness.

The Lord called out to Ab before he plunged the knife into Isaac.

Vs 12: Do not raise your hand against the boy, or do anything to him. EQ.

Now that the Lord knew Ab feared God and would do as he was told no matter how mad, like a soldier that is told to shoot women and children and drop bombs on them.

So Ab burnt a ram instead.

And God blessed him.

Vs. 17: I will bestow My blessing upon you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars of heaven and the sands on the seashore; and your descendants shall seize the gates of their foes. EQ. Everyone.

Now if we are to believe this genocide fairy tale, we are talking one very long family feud.

Ab’s brother, Nahor, had eight sons, one being Bethnel, the father of Rebekah. To make it twelve, Nahor also had 4 sons with his concubine.

And if anyone wonders why always 12 sons, it has everything to do with astrology. Everything.

So that we do not forget that we are in a universe. And that a few thousand years after the stories, we notice that the earth is not alone or without influence. And when the age of darkness comes to an end in the spring of 2009 in our present calendar, we can overcome our madness and awaken.


chapter 23

vs. 2: Sarah died in Kiriath – now Hebron – in the land of Canaan; EQ.

Ab was sad and needed a place to bury his sister-wife. Concubine of Kings. Otherwise know as Lords.

Everyone liked Ab ‘cause he was the man who God liked. The very scary God.

Ab wanted a cave and a field and Ephron the Hittite was willing to give it to him. Ab wanted to buy it so it was sold to him for 400 pieces of silver.

A friendly transaction. And the first land Ab owned.

As far as your humble narrator can tell, this chapter tells us nothing. Just a little story.


chapter 24

One of the reasons the Bible is never read by ignorant followers willing to murder children in its name is, it can be tedious.

To say Ab didn’t want Isaac to marry a slave, or as they were called, Canaanites, but a closer cousin, a grand story must be told.

And the short of it is, Ab made his top servant feel his leg and make an oath before sending him with a camel caravan with men and many presents to the well his brother Nahor had. And much praying and praising the Lord before the virgin Rebekah, Isaac’s cousin, came to the well.

He invited himself to spend the night. And the servant told the story again about how he asked the Lord and then there was Rebekah watering his camels.

At Ab’s father’s house.

He told them Isaac was to inherit all the wealth of Ab so how about it, keep it in the family. So we can interbreed and in a few generations we’ll all have countless inherent diseases.

They wanted to keep her for a while but the servant didn’t want no delays. And nor did Rebekah.

So they blessed her.

Vs. 60: “O sister!
May you grow
Into thousands of myriads;
May your offspring seize
The gates of their foes.” EQ.

And murder every last one of them.

When they got back, Isaac took her straight to his mom’s tent and boned her. That made him feel better, having his mom dead and all.




chapters 25 - 27