barbaralba's translation of the new testament
BARBARALBA BIBLE

THE NEW NEW TESTAMENT

Paul's letter to the ROMANS

 

chapter 04

Believers. Wake up. There is one indisputable truth that can no longer be denied. And it is this.

We are here. Now.

Write that on your hand and memorize it.

Paul continues his field of shit letter using the word God in 47.6% of the sentences. And he makes us want to believe this is an entity that took favour in some fuck up named Abraham when his wife Sarah finally had sex with a Lord passing through on his camel.

vs. 17: "I have made you father of many nations." EQ

vs. 13: When God promised Abraham and his descendents that the world would belong to him... EQ

He was a Goddamn lier. The world does not belong to the fuckin' inbred sperm worshippers with their foreskin cut off. It belongs to the fish. And it is our job to be guardians of the fish. Because they can not build the space technology required to direct asteroids away from the wet planet.

Very wet.

Do not fear wet. We are animated water sacks with some calcium and carbon. And 2 billion years of biological sharing of information.

Paul is almost always exactly backwards and upside down.

Any fuck wit that tells you that you must die to go to heaven needs a slap in the face. Not too hard first time.

And tell the fuck wit.

"Hey. Fuck wit." Slap. "Heaven is here and now."

"No. you are a sinner. You must slave your whole life for the man, then you can die and go to heaven."

Slap other side of face.

chapter 05

Fighting ignorance builds character(s).

Ha. Another diamond. At the end of five. So hang on. There is truth buried in here.

AH Paul goes on about faith. The word God goes up to 52.6%. He tells us God was angry with us. He means the Moses story. And starts in on how because Adam sinned. As in Adam tasted from the tree of knowledge.

Well let's tell you what happened there with Adam. Or let us say the people of the Earth a few short thousand years ago.

We became aware of our being here.

And there were those more aware than others and they took advantage of that and tried to keep the rest of us stupid.

vs. 13: where there is no law, no account is kept of sin. 14. But from the time of Adam to the time of Moses death ruled over all mankind... EQ

That, my dedicated and patient readers is one big fat diamond of truth.

The war lords keep the people in poverty of soul and body and sell them the concept of the finality of death.

Death is like a midlife crisis that wipes out the accumulated misconceptions. And I love Monster Magnet.

Now we move to MM O'hara and remember shortly my friends at the squeeze.

Okay.

vs. 16: "Not guilty!" EQ

We are lead to believe, with this Death Cult, that because Adam ate from the tree of knowledge. Women no longer exist and we are all sinners.

Ignorance is a dead end street for a species with control of the energy of atoms. And here is the truth diamond one more time.

vs. 20: Law was introduced in order to increase wrong doing... EQ

chapter 06


vs. 1: What shall we say, then? EQ

Then now we say. Alarm. The planet is being killed by us. This is not a point we can ignore.

vs. 4: ... just as Christ was raised from death by the glorious power of the Father... EQ

Change the word Father for Life. And see that life has been one thing evolving. One mass of a thing. Becoming many yet still one. All here on one planet. 2 billion years of reincarnating life. Ever and always, 'sept cockroaches, mutating. Evolving from not yet one cell, not yet very aware creatures of life. In what looks like a march toward the heavens.

"We were born before the wind, yet younger than the sun." Van Morrison.

People, we are loosing far too much in our quiet obedience.

vs. 9: For we know that Christ has been raised from death and will never die again - death will no longer rule over him. EQ

vs. 12: Sin must no longer rule in your mortal bodies, so that you obey the desires of your natural self. EQ

vs. 14: Sin must not be your master; for you do not live under law but under God's (Life's) grace.

vs. 15: Surely you know than when you surrender yourselves as slaves to obey someone, you are in fact the slaves of the master you obey - EQ

Paul is on a roll. Back from the master of a shit storm to very beautiful clarity. I kiss you my bastard brother.

vs. 22: But now you have been set free from sin and are the slaves (servants) of God (Life), and the result is eternal life. EQ.

Jesus cryed tears of joy.


romans chapters 07 - 09