chapter 04

So Jesus follows the white bird into the desert to have a talk with the devil. And since 40 days was the tradition from Lord Moses, Jesus also didn't eat anything that counted as food.

Then, when Jesus was delirious from hunger, the devil showed up in his face.

"Turn the rocks into bread, Jesus. If you really are the son of God."

So Jesus quoted Moses full out of context.

"Man don't live by bread alone."

Moses and God were angry that day and blew quail hip deep into camp so many died from a month's worth of rotten bird meat.

Which is sort of like God's law.

But the devil had no quail so they went to Jerusalem, the bloody holy city. Holy bloody city. City holy blood. And told Jesus to jump.

Jesus said no.

So they went to a mountain overlooking a very small portion of the kingdoms of the world and the devil said.

"If you worship me, you can have all this."

Now this may be another piece of the thread. The concept of owning. Jesus was made to be King of the Jews. All he had to do was put together an army and force Rome out of the promise land.

But he decided against this endless killing for wealth and land. Said no to capitalism and slavery. He was up to something different.

"Go away, Devil."

So the devil left and the angel friends of Jesus came and helped him return from his visions of delirium.

The next thing what happens is, John is thrown in prison on account he was verbally ripping at the system.

So Jesus left for a Gentile territory. Near lake Galilee. Because it was in the script. Esaias figured a Messiah would have to leave the land of the religion he intended to expose.

And he started teaching. Repent. For the kingdom of heaven is here and now.

Down by the lake he saw the two brothers Peter Von Simon and Andy. Fishing for fish with a fish net and Jesus told them to come fishing for men with words.

They thought that was cool and left their father alone in the boat.

And he grabbed up Called James and John, two more brothers. And they left their father and followed Jesus.

Jesus had his major in the Laws of Moses, theology and philosophy. He was well read by the time he started preaching in the synagogues. A priest with intention to bring heaven down to Earth.

He healed sick people, likely had a degree in medicine.

But his specialty was disorders. Demons and epileptics and paralytics.

These things are easy to fake. Makes for a good show. But we won't suggest that he was without powers. A man, woman, with a little faith, even with no god, can influence the world around them. Especially when many ailments are psycosizematrick. Or whatever.

Hell, even money hungry evangelists get people up off their asses.

Jesus. Motivate us.

chapter 05

Jesus goes up a mountain to preach, or rather teach his disciples. With the multitudes down in the valley.

And he does the made famous by Moses and Ab, Isaac and Jacob. Blessed is.

Blessed are: the spiritually poor 'cause heaven is theirs, the mourners 'cause everyone loves someone worse off than them, the meek, so you get the earth, the hungry who seek righteousness, 'cause whatever, merciful, pure in heart.

And the peacemakers, for they are the true children, or maybe the ancestors, of the gods.

'Cause we can do a hell of a lot more with heaven when we aren't wasting our time, energy, resources and lives and planet on the great war business.

This is really weird not using words what they call four letter words. But Mom might want to read it.

Word is a 4 letter word.

Dung. I digress.

And blessed are you if you are persecuted and slandered. So were the other prophets. You are the salt and if you ain't salty you are pointless. Unless you are light. If so stand up and glow. Light your house.

Now don't think I have come to destroy the laws of Moses. I just wanna point out that they are fully out dated and we are in dire need of a major overhaul.

And we will make everything come true what the book said and then we can close it.

Now you gotta be more righteous than the generation of vipers if you wanna get into the kingdom of heaven.

The law says don't kill. Unless at war or you are a priest.

But I say if you are hopping mad with your brother and say he's a bonehead, that sucks too. And can cost you hell fire.

Don't even bother bringing the Lord God a sacrifice. Until you have settled your problems with your brother.

If you get trouble with anyone. Settle quickly. Out of court. Judges might throw you in prison. Lawyers will take your money.

No adultery.

But I say even looking at a woman and wanting to do all the things that 2 billion years of carbon based life evolution has been longing for, is adultery.

So if your right eye won't obey the laws of Moses, pluck it out. Better than having the body burn in hell.

And cut your hand off if you are masturbating and thinking of a creature you are not married to. Throw it away.

And if you divorce your wife you are forcing her to commit adultery.

Says Jesus, the bastard. Or the writer of the Moses update 1.0.

Now here is a point said more than a few times and it is more significant than we give it credit. Even the Christian and Jews ignore it.

Do not swear. As in vow. Not on heaven, earth or bloody bible when you are in court.

Do not swear on the Bible.

Let yes mean yes and no mean no.

The significance, one may ask. The significance is, it is stupid to believe that it means anything. A lyer can lie under oath. And you might also promise something you can't do. And get all neurotic.

It's not quite how I want to explain it but it comes up often so I'll let it go for now.

Now we have been taught eye for eye, tooth for tooth. But now I update that too. Someone smacks you on the right cheek, show your left.

"Hit me again, you brute."

If someone sues you for your shirt, give him your coat too.

If one of those raping occupation soldiers orders you to carry his pack a mile, do two. Someone wants something, give it.

Now if you don't catch the subtle arrogance in this, try again.

Now Moses taught us to hate Gentiles and kill them at all times. Love your brothers and cousins. Well, that's dumb. Even tax collectors are nice to people they like. Don't bother with hate. You can better rid yourself of your enemies by loving them.

Now this ain't as crazy or as hard as one might think. It is a fairly serious piece of the thread of truth.

And not because Jesus said so. Because hate on hate is really very very stupid and unbelievably ignorant.

chapter 06

Now don't go making a show of giving and making religious rituals in public. Keep that to yourself. The only god that matters is in your head.

Don't be like the hypocrites that blow their own horn every time they drop some silver in the synagogue or on the street.

"Look at me. I give."

They stand around praying to show how holy they are to everyone else.

Nonsense. Pointless stupid prattle.

God is in your head. Pray in a closed closet.

Don't use prefabricated dribble. Get to the point. Like this:

The kingdom is here. God's will will be done here and in the heavens. Don't let us go hungry. Don't make me pay debts and I won't collect none. Don't tempt me to do anything I shouldn't do. Keep bad assed mean people out of my face.

'Cause this is heaven. Paradise for evolution of life. Till the end of the universe.

Amen.

Don't be afraid to bless some family and friends. Like this at the end.

God bless mommy and daddy and even my bitch sister who always tells lies.

And forgive people who wrong you. You'll learn to also forgive yourself. Your God will. If you don't you won't know how.

Now when you do your fasting, don't go around with a long face and dirty hair. Shave and dress normal. Keep your fasting to yourself. Your unseen God sees you.

And capitalism is very dangerous. Just have a look at all the killing and slavery it requires. Make being in heaven your riches.

Your eyes are the light, the front window of your you. The angel in you can be found there if you let it. Don't let it be a window to darkness.

You can forget about worshipping money and figuring out about heaven both.

Don't worry about what you are going to eat or your clothes. Look at the birds.

This is actually how humans lived until the advent of cultivation, kings and war.

Now that we have plundered so much and we are not able to pick berries because they are all behind fences, the system, kings, governments or the corporations that own the government, have to give out the basic needs.

For example 800 Euro per month. And no, this is not a crazy idea. It is an idea whose time has come. No more welfare. A simple basic life allowance. Work if you want. Don't if you have anything else to do. We can afford it. And it will have unbelievable affects against animosity and well, figure it out.

No major worries.

And anyway, don't worry. Worrying don't help anyway. Just a waist of time for people who like to waste time. When trouble come, deal with it.


chapters 07 - 09