chapter 07

When the Tabernacle was set up, Moses anointed and consecrated it and its furnishings.

“Balla, balla, bim. Everything is holy within.”

So the chiefs of each tribe brought what the Lord Moses demanded. He gave it to the Levite priests. Six carts and 12 oxen.

Two carts, four oxen to the Gershonites. Four and eight to the Merarities. The Kohathites had to handle extremely holy shit so they carried it on their shoulders. Across the hot desert.

For each tribe, the chief gave the Lord, one day after the other, one silver bowl, one silver basin with flour and oil. One gold ladle with incense, one bull, one ram, one lamb, one goat, two oxen, five rams, five he-goats, five lambs.

Nahshon son of Amminadab.

The second till the twelfth day, the same price was paid by Nethanel, Eliab, Elizur, Shelumid, Eliasaph, Elishama, Gamalid, Abidam, Ahiezer, Pagiel, Ahira, and if you want their father’s names, check the original translation.

The original translation even does the math for you. For example, if 12 tribes each give a silver bowl, in the end, there are 12 silver bowls. 24 bulls.

So Moses went in the tent and the Lord told him more what to do to the Israelites.


chapter 08

The Lord told Moses to tell Aaron how to make and set up the lamps. The Lord had a special pattern.

Meanwhile in Pakistan, landowners are raping peasant girls and killing them.

So the Lord said, clean the Levites. So they sprinkled water on them, shaved off all hair and washed their clothes.

Then they took a couple bulls and made a ritual slaughter so the Levites would be elevated over the rest of the Israelites.

The Lord owned the Levites. “Levites are mine. They belong to me. The chosen of the chosen.”

“I killed the first born of the Egyptians. So the Levites are mine. And all the first born animals.”

“Any thing else, Mister Holy Dictator.”

“Stay the fuck away from my sanctuary that you might not die.”

So everything Moses said, everyone did. Or died.

Retirement age for the tent workers was 50. They could stand guard and kill people who got close. But no work no more.

Life expectancy was 42 back then anywhore.


chapter 09

The Lord also said there were rules how and when to celibate the holy first son murder day. Like he did at least once before, the Lord of random rule redundancy.

For the passover murder feast, one had to be clean. Inevitably some are away or hanging out with a dead corpse of a loved one. Or a wife.

So they complained.

Vs. 8: “Stand by and let me hear what instructions the Lord gives about you.” EQ

Today we would say: “Wait a minute and let me think about it.” Moses talked to the same Lord we all talk to. Our own heads.

Well, like it so often is when one gets to talking to the Lord , the Lord comes up with an idea or two. So the Lord said, “Right, then. You can all party a month later.”

And because murder is the highest holiday, if someone who is clean and not on a trip gotta do the rite or they can be separated from their family.

With a sword.

If a stranger who hasn’t been killed is living or visiting among you. He has to do the passover. And if he is an Egyptian or has an aversion to the celebration of murder rites.

Too fuckin’ bad.

There is one law for you, no matter who you are. The Lord Moses said.



chapters 10 - 12